sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Randomize