question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
