they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
He kissed a someone with a penis
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vagina is talking i cant
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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