Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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