is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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