This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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