Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
