I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
