I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.