I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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