Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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