I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
BRING THE BAGELS
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
