so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
