Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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