you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
