Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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