Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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