i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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