I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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