Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Floor bacon is actually really good
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize