thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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