They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
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