We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
