If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
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