Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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