your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize