He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize