She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
