Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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