i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
