do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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