so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
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we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
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nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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