"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
