My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize