I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Dick very happy bro
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Randomize
