I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
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