Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize
