I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
