If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
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