Its about making memories worth repressing
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize