soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
