Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Randomize