I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday