i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
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You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
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I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper