Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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