we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
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So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
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sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
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