I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
