cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
I'm at about main and main street
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
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