K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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