Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
