She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
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Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
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Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
When did angry sex become our thing?
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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