i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize